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The Real War
'At 10:35 AM MST on October 18, 2019, The great communist TheUberKitty (Jon) caused the first act of aggression. TheUberKitty went to the land of The Sun and burnt the holy bridge of Ra that linked the light of the land to the rest of the world. This caused the outbreak of the The Real War. At first The land of The Sun was neutral and good, until TheUberKitty kept inciting the wrath of The Sun. This was the first act and sin of Jon. ' 'Jon then destroyed the trust that had existed between the Pagado and the land of The Sun for a decade. Jonah The God of Sun went to peace talks and an attempt on his life was made by none other than Jon. Thus in a freak accident of adrenaline and a need for self preservation, somehow the Pagoda was unfortunately lost to mother nature's fury. The land of The Sun's fortress of light was then mysteriously blown asunder by acts of terrorism. Thus the second act and sin of Jon. ' 'The Final Battle occurred in the neutral land of the Savannah owned by the merciful SlashedAnimal . Jonah The God of Sun was on peace talks in SlashedAnimaleSlashedAnimal lands when the two were ambushed. The killer, The Butcher of the Savannah, The betrayer, TheUberkitty led a band of psychopathic killers from the Ringo Star family to massacre the two peacekeepers. Both SlashedAnimal and Jonah The God of Sun were caught defenseless. A great battle was fought, the valiant hero SlashedAnimal fought all the Ringo Star family at once and held them back almost killing all of them, until TheUberkitty , the snake struck him down from behind killing the man that only fought for his people, his ideas, and his land. This was the third act and sin of Jon and the Ringo Star family. ' 'While TheUberkitty revel in his victory, Jonah The Sun God attacked head on challenging all of the Ringo Star family and TheUberkitty at once. He struck down TheUberkitty and threw him off a mountain. To his death. Fortunately for the Alliance of The Sun. One of Ringos Star family went to collect TheUberkitty gear, found it, and retardly walked in a straight line, into lava. (Absolute troglodyte). Thus the battle was won. ' 'Jonah The Sun God sings a song about the war, about the justice that was served, about the victory of the sun, and about avenging the good in the world. ' 'Long ago in a distant land, I, TheUberkitty , the shapeshifting master of darkness, unleashed an unspeakable evil upon the Land of The Sun! But a mighty warrior of the sun wielding a magic sword stepped forth to oppose him. Before the final blow was struck, TheUberkitty tore open a portal in time and magic arrow pierced through the heart of the great Jonah. Where TheUberkittys evil could have been law! Now the fool seeks to return to the past and undo the golden future that is Jonah The God of The Sun! '